tlhIngan Soj - Klingon Food, Part 2

A well-fed warrior is prepared to battle any enemy and claim glory for the Empire; a warrior displeased with his meal looks to the cook for retribution. -- Klingon for the Galactic Traveler

And so we come to the next stage in our examination of the eating habits of Klingons. Today, we will be taking a close look at the most famous item in the Klingon culinary repertoire.


qagh gagh, aka serpent worms.
Gagh is a delicacy whose fame extends beyond the boundaries of the Klingon Empire. What is generally not known is that gagh comes in at least 51 varieties, each with its own quirks and textures. Some of the named varieties of gagh are:-

Wistan gagh: this comes packed in targ blood.

Filden gagh: this variety squirms.

Meshta gagh: this variety jumps

Torgud gagh: this is the variety which wiggles

Bithool gagh has feet.

Gagh preparation

Klingon for the Galactic Traveler has this to say about gagh.

Perhaps the most representative Klingon food, certainly the one best known outside of the Empire, is gagh (or, in Klingon, qagh): serpent worms in a thick sauce (called ghevI'). Prior to the preparation of this dish, the worms are fed only 'Iw puj ("diluted blood"; literally, "weak blood"), which the worms find unappetizing and therefore consume only when they are nearly starving. The type of animal from which the blood has been taken has a great deal of influence on the eventual flavor of the qagh, and individual cooks, as well as individual eaters, have their own preferences. As the final step in preparing the dish, the worms are poured into a bowl filled with the ghevI' (sauce), which contains, among other ingredients, pellets of an extremely flavorful herb that the hungry worms quickly ingest, even though it is toxic to them and kills them within minutes. Since qagh is considered best if consumed while the worms are still alive, it is important to keep the worms out of the sauce until just before the dish is served. For the same reason, it is customary to eat qagh as quickly as possible. If, for some reason, the qagh cannot be consumed before they all die, the entire mixture of qagh and ghevI' is saved and later heated up as a sort of stew (the general term for which is tlhIq; thus, qagh tlhIq may be translated as "qagh stew"). Although not as desirable as live qagh, this is a common way to serve leftovers.

The key terms are:-

qagh	gagh
'Iw puj	weak blood
targh 'Iw	targ blood
ghevI'	sauce in which gagh is served
qagh tlhIq	gagh stew

Klingon Sayings Connected To Gagh

The following popular sayings appear in The Klingon Way: A Warrior's Guide:-

qagh Sopbe'!

He doesn't eat gagh!

Everyone loves gagh, so if one is not eating it, something must be wrong. This expression is used to mean that there is something wrong with someone or that someone is acting suspiciously. It is also a way to refer to somebody as a coward. For Klingons, among whom cursing is a highly developed art form, this is a rather mild dismissive remark, not a strong insult. As this expression demonstrates, even though Klingon culture in known for its directness, it is also capable of expressing ideas subtly.

qagh HoH

kill gagh

Gagh, the Klingon delicacy consisting of serpent worms in a sauce, is ideally eaten while the worms are still alive. To kill gagh (qagh HoH), therefore, is counterproductive, to say the least, and that is the notion this idiom conveys. The phrase is applied to a person and means that he or she is doing something counterproductive:

SuyDuj DaQaw'chugh qagh DaHoH	If you destroy the merchant ship, you kill gagh
SuyDuj	merchant ship
DaQaw'chugh	If you destroy it

-- that is, destroying the merchant ship is contrary to the best interests of the current mission.

yIntaHbogh qagh jablu'DI' reH nIvqu' qagh

Gagh is always best when served live

When Klag said this to William Riker, he was speaking literally, actually talking about the Klingon delicacy gagh, or serpent worms. The same expression, however, is often used figuratively to mean that a fight is always better when there is a worthy adversary, or that one should always want to face real challenges.

Next week: An interruption for a very special post. The food posts resume 2014-01-08.

Klingon for The Galactic Traveler - Gone Walkabout

I'm in a bit of a tight spot.

My only copy of Klingon for The Galactic Traveler, the sequel to The Klingon Dictionary, has apparently vanished from my bag while I was in town. I noticed its absence on Thursday night, and a search of the flat has proven negative.

I do need a copy pretty badly. I have been blogging about Klingon food for my blog, tlhIngan paQDI'norgh, which was why it was in my possession and n my bag, where I had deemed the risk of this happening acceptable. It was being used for research.

I've ordered a new hardback copy from Amazon, but I won't see it until June or July. If I am lucky. And Waterstones are giving me problems with my purchase of an ePub downloadable copy. I've contacted the customer service number; I'll have to do so again after the weekend.

That still leaves me with this sad problem of getting a replacement book, just before a major post and all.

I don't feel sad by the loss. I feel the challenge of getting a replacement. I feel the inconvenience.

And I am chalking this down to absent-mindedness. If I left the book behind on some surface in town accidentally, welp. Even though I can guess that, pretty much, if anybody sees a Klingon language book lying around unattended, with its edges showing the signs of frequent handling, the spine creased and the cover looking like a moulting reptile, they are going to know beyond the shadow of a doubt whose book that is.

And also that I would post about its disappearance and make a very loud Klingon stink about it.

tlhIngan Soj - Klingon Food, Part 1

And so we come to the big post. Klingon food. What do Klingons consider to be good eating?

Due to the high Klingon metabolism, eating and drinking are an important part of Klingon life next to fighting. A full Klingon meal may consist of between four and five dishes.

Klingons enjoy a variety of good food. Not all of it looks like piles of cold offal unceremonoously slapped onto the plate or eaten live and still squirming. Klingon food can be prepared a number of different ways, including coating in crumbs, soaking in a marinade, stewing or even partial fermentation. Some food is boiled or rendered, some frozen, and some recipes do actually call for the food to be deep-fried.


Typical Klingon meals include breakfast, lunch, dinner and the midnight snack - actually often a full meal unto itself.

nIQ	breakfast
megh	lunch
'uQ	dinner
'uQ'a'	banquet, feast
ghem	midnight snack
nay'	dish, course

The people who prepare food and drinks have a variety of different titles. The basic preparer of food, whether solid or liquid, is known as a vutwI'. Sometimes, a separate jabwI' server serves the food - the verb jab means to serve food (or drinks). A bartender who serves drinks in a bar is known as a chom. The place where each serves is called Qe' restaurant and tach bar, respectively.


Fast food exists in the Klingon Empire, known as moD Soj - literally the food hurries. Such a place, known as a Do Qe' velocity restaurant, does not have a vutwI' - instead, they have a tebwI', a (plate) filler.

vutwI'	cook
jabwI'	server
chom	bartender
tebwI'	fast food worker
Qe'	restaurant
Do Qe'	fast food place
moD Soj	fast food

Hapmey lI' Useful Substances

There are a number of useful substances which are used by Klingons in food preparation, but which themselves are not considered food. They are used as part of food preparation.

An example is 'atlhqam, a kind of fungus which is used to ferment various kinds of meat or vegetables. 'atlhqam is scraped (tey scrape) from trees, but it is also found between the toes of certain animals.

'atlhqam vIlo'bogh Ha'DIbaH vIrogh, 'ej vIwech

I ferment the meat with the fungus and serve it at its peak

'atlhqam	type of fungus used to ferment food
rogh	ferment
wech	serve food at its peak

Sometimes, living animals are used to process the food. A sauce called quD is produced by digesting a substance called Su'lop in the stomach of an animal; at its peak, the quD is cut out of the animal's belly and served with a flourish. The process is called Suqqa':-

quD vISuqqa'

I obtain the quD

In the absence of a suitable animal, the chef uses a vat and a mix of enzymes which digests the quD artificially - the result is called 'un quD pot quD, and while it is chemically identical to the naturally-produced burgh quD stomach quD Klingons would prefer the natural burgh quD when it is available.


Another common substance is ngat. This is a granulated cartilage mixed with a grain (tIr grain) and is typically coated over the food being prepared. The verb for this is pID. The closest translation for ngat is breadcrumbs, even though no actual breadcrumbs are used to make the ngat.

ngat vIlo'bogh lIngta' gham vIpID

I I coat the lingta limb with breadcrumbs

chanDoq is a very common Klingon food substance. chanDoq is a marinade. Every chef worth his salt has a stock of chanDoq. It could be said that each Klingon chef's chanDoq is different. Every Klingon chef guards the recipe for his chanDoq with ferocity. The process of soaking or drenching the food in the chanDoq is called HaH.

chanDoq vIlo'bogh lIngta' gham vIHaH

I I steep the lingta limb in the marinade

Sometimes, the chanDoq is thickened to form a chanDoq jeD thick chanDoq - this is served as a sauce. Other kinds of sauces include 'uSu', which is usually served in a jug as an accompaniment to gladst (tlhatlh 'uSu' bal means gladst with jug of 'uSu'), ghevI' which is the sauce in which qagh is usually served, and the concoction of animal blood, herbs and condiments in which some food is stewed - the verb to stew is Qev.


Next: More Klingon food.

Klingon Verbs Relating To Food and Drink

After the list of food implements, here is a basic list of food and food-related terms.

vut	cook, prepare food
ragh	decay, rot
raghmoH	rot (cause to decay)
rogh	ferment
roghmoH	ferment (cause to ferment)
jab	serve food
wech	serve fermented food at its peak
teb	fill (a bowl, jug or container)
pID	coat with herbed granulated cartilage (the equivalent of coating it in breadcrumbs)
pub	boil
'Im	render, boil fat
mIQ	deep-fry
HaH	drench, soak, marinade, steep
tap	mash, pound into pulp
Qev	heat up food in a special sauce, stew
raQ	handle, manipulate by hand
tujchoHmoH	heat up, apply heat
bIrchoHmoH	chill
taD	be frozen
taDmoH	freeze
tlhorghmoH	spice up, make food pungent
Suqqa'	prepare quD in a specific way (literally, "get back")

Sop	eat
tlhutlh	drink
'ep	slurp, gulp soup
chop	bite
choptaH	gnaw (literally, "continue to bite")
noS	nibble
roS	lick
pe'	cut
tey	scrape
wItlh	break off, tear off a piece

waH	taste, sample, try out
largh	smell, detect odours
mum	taste, sense flavours
Hot	feel, touch
He'	smell, emit odour
He'So'	stink

wejwa'

flavour, taste (n)

tIv	enjoy
muS	loathe, detest
muSHa'	love, adore
wIv	choose
Ho'	admire
maS	prefer
qaq	preferable, be preferable, better
le'	special, exceptional
le'be'	nonspecific, be nonspecific, unexceptional
Daj	interesting, be interesting
Dal	boring, be boring

na'	be brackish, salty
jeD	be thick, viscous, soupy
jeDHa'	be thin, runny
ngal	be chewy
char	be slimy
vIl	be ridgy (like a Klingon forehead)
ghIH	be sloppy
tlher	be lumpy
na'ran rur	be sweet (literally, "resembling a na'ran")
wIb	be sour, bitter
ghoQ	be freshly killed (meat)
baQ	be freshly picked (fruit, vegetables)
jej	be sharp (slang)
tlhol	be raw, unprocessed
DeH	be ripe, overripe
nIt	be pure, unsullied
vutlu'pu'bogh	be cooked, processed
'ey	tasty, be tasty, delicious, appetising
'eyHa'	be unappealing, unappetising
tlhorgh	be hot, spicy, pungent
tlhorghHa'	be bland
tuj	be hot (have a high temperature)
bIr	be cold
le'be'	be unexceptional
'up	be disgusting
qub	be rare

rIn len

The little break is over. From this point forwards, Klingon Teachings presents on a new day - Sundays, typically 21:00 GMT or British Summer Time.

I resume the food topic next week.